Friday, July 12, 2013

For the record.

Here is how much of an old lady I am - last week I said to someone that Jay-Z had “a new record album coming out.” 

I am saddened that my kids are growing up without a record player in the house. I know I need to fix that.
They also need an avocado green rotary phone hanging on the wall in the kitchen with a long curly cord - they neeeed that.

I miss the ritual of lifting the smoky black plastic lid, pulling the album out of its jacket and putting the needle down, then studying the album cover like I was going to have a life or death test on it in the morning.

I'm so angry that I sold my record player and sold most of my record collection after graduating college, when taking them to Music Millennium and getting cash seemed to make the most sense. Because I needed cash to go out drinking, buy cheap, crummy furniture from Target and get those expensive boots. And why the hell would I ever need a record player again? Ugh.

Below are a few albums that I have vivid memories of admiring, buying and listening to.

Get Lucky – Loverboy.
This one stands out because I remember it as one of the first albums I bought with my own money. I had seen the videos on MTV for “Gangs in the Street” and “When it’s Over” and had saved up my allowance to go out and buy it - proud to present my crumbled up cash to the guy behind the counter who kind of laughed and said, "Loverboy, huh?"

I think I was like eleven at the time and I remember my mom being unhappy when I came home with it because of the album cover, with that sweet ass in those tight red leather pants. I assumed the sweet ass belonged to Mike Reno, the lead singer who I thought was pretty hot. I spent many a night studying it carefully and was disappointed to learn later that the ass belonged to the fourteen-year-old daughter of the photographer. I think that's Mike Reno's hand maybe? I hope it's not her dad's. Gross. 

Between thinking this girls butt was hot and watching
Porky's at much too young of an age, no wonder I was confused.
Thanks a lot, Loverboy.

Radio Active – Various Artists – K-Tel Records.
Oh, I just get a happy feeling thinking about those old K-tel commercials...

I walked up to Woolworths with my grandma and she let me pick out "ANYTHING I WANTED" so of course I chose this album and was awesome. What I loved the most about my K-tel records was the variety of music on them – how about a little Pat Benatar thrown in with some Rick James? Or some Go-Go’s/Commodores action? The record started off with “Every Little Thing She Does is Magic” by The Police and ended with “Rapture” by Blondie. Radio Active was my original "mix tape." But it was an album. A good ‘effin album.

This Radio Active robot will live in my brain forever.
Led Zeppelin III.
I was never a huge Led Zeppelin fan, I’m pretty sure I inherited this album from my music mentor, my Uncle Bob. Here’s what I did love about the album – the cover. It was kind of like a Hūsker Dū game, for those you who remember the memory game Hūsker Dū, where you could spin a little cardboard wheel and make different images appear through all the cutout circles. You covered them with checkers and tried to match up the symbols. 

Another reason I remember this album is because I traded it for a make out session with a guy named Davey who looooovvvved Led Zeppelin. He and I made out in his closet for like, ten minutes. It was totally worth it.

Whenever I hear "Immigrant Song" I think of Davey. And a closet.
And how his house smelled like macaroni.
And was that kind of a weird Pretty Woman moment for me?
This weekend I'm totally hitting some garage sales and getting a record player - done deal.
And if I'm lucky, an avocado green curly-tangley-cord phone too for the kitchen.
Because, the kids, right???

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