Thursday, February 14, 2013

To all the boys I've loved before.

Of course I love Valentine's Day.
Hearts, candy, flowers, chocolate, lace, cupids, doilies, pink, red, candy, chocolate, candy - I love all that.

This love of love-day goes back to childhood and the fact that my mother always made each and every holiday a major event.
The house would be decorated - red and pink cutout hearts clashed against the insane orange, yellow and avocado green tulip wallpaper in the kitchen. Cookies would be baked and brought to school shaped like hearts with hand-frosted sayings like, "URAQT" and "INVU."

My mom was crafty and clever and I would beam when she came into my class in the middle of the day with her homemade goodness.

Memories of Valentine's Day during the high school years are of course much more dra-ma-tic. This is me after all, and this is high school.

I had been keeping diaries and journals since I was eight.
99% of the entries from age twelve on up focus on one subject.


At the end of the high-school-day, I had to love somebody, anybody.
I had to be able to write their name in big, bubbly 80's handwriting in a heart at the bottom of every entry.

Let's give a proper shout out to all the boys I've loved before, taken from the bottoms of the pages of my teenage diaries - Julio Iglesias/Willie Nelson style.

My first real, official boyfriend Albert. Tampa, Florida,
I must have been 14 or so. He was 18 and from Cuba and had
the thickest, waviest black hair ever. He wore tight parachute pants. Whenever I hear "Feel For You" by Chaka Khan I think of Albert dancing outside at a party on a giant piece of cardboard.

Jason. He gave me the biggest damn balloon ever on
Valentine's Day. It exploded five minutes later on the popcorn-ceiling of our living room.

I loved Jason SO much I devoted an entire page of my diary to him.
Jason and I had a torrid extra-dramatic relationship - there were a lot of emergency breakthrough calls (remember those?)
I flushed his pot down my toilet when I was mad at him.
My dad told me that wasn't a very nice thing to do.

Steve worked at Oak Tree at Tampa Bay Mall and dated me after he broke up with my b/b/f Susanne. Steve was "a waver" with hair that swooped in front of one eye. He wore shiny black shoes and was always dressed way better than I was and I think his family was from France? He was a bad kisser with really good hair.

Whenever I hear the Hysteria album by Def Leppard,
I think of Larry.
Love bites.
I have no clue who Josh is and that doesn't surprise me,
seeing that my love for him was questionable.

Again, no idea who Jeff is/was.
Apparently he was cute.

I love Mike. And Depeche Mode.
And Magenta from Rocky Horror.
And smiley faces.

Kevin was on the football team.
On this day he looked at me in the hall,
so he gets his name inside a heart.

Thinking back...there was one boy in the mix who was always there for me.
Through everything - boyfriends, break ups, make ups and make outs.
 Witness to almost every diary entry ever written. Never judgey; a sweet boy.
Smartest/truest thing I ever wrote
in that pile of books.


  1. I remember how your Mom used to decorate and get into ever holiday. Was always secretly Oh, I also remember your love Marshmallow...cutie. - Sue

    1. Sue, such good memories - happy valentines day sweetie!!!

  2. Marshy. :( Sniff. So cute! I love my girl-cats, but boy-cats are extra special!

    1. Favorite pet ever. Marshy 4eva!!!