Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Dial me up anytime.

You gotta get a gimmick!

You know what made these beauty products better?
They had a dial on them. There was a click, a snap, you turned them and set them.

Awesome!

Products like this were made for someone like me. I took my hard earned money from working at the video store and gladly gave it away to get these little clickers in my hand.

They may not have been the best products in the world but lord knows, when I think back to them I get a little chill, a shudder if joy. Did I mention they had a dial on them??? I was in totally charge!

Maybelline Dial-a-Lash Mascara.
I always enjoyed this ad campaigns 
use of the word 'globs.'
I remember these commercials starred a lioness looking woman talking in one of those weird trans-Atlantic-semi-European accent saying, “Dial it low, for a light coat…dial it high, for a dramatic look.” Mascara with a little dial on it? I was sold. Something like this was right up my alley. Plus I wanted to look and talk like the lioness lady, so this mascara could help. The dial was pretty useless for me, since I loved wearing a ton of make up it was constantly at setting number ten. What was the point of using a one when the ten was available? Guess what? This mascara is now discontinued. People realized that you could get the same ten effect by simply putting on an extra coat of any old mascara. But it’s kind of not the same as turning that big ‘ol dial with the shiny gold numbers at the bottom of the tube.

Flicker Razors.
Flickers angle on the razor world was that shaving your legs with a mans razor was downright dangerous. Really bad things could happen to you, like the razor could develop devilish cartoon eyes and a demonic personality and try to attack you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NF4DFeJSB5I

To avoid this happening, you needed a big round, hard to hold razor made "just for a woman." Flicker had five blades inside, you would turn the dial when one wore out and move on to the next one. It’s big claim to fame was that it was “designed to cut hair and not skin” which is good, because I have that other razor that I use when I want to just cut my skin. I remember deciding not to use the Flicker anymore after wasting way too much time trying to shave my armpits with something round. It didn’t work. Guess what? This razor is also now discontinued.

The click of my mouse as I write this is making me all nostalgic.

Wishing I had a little Dial-a-Lash today, I’d even be willing to try a lower gold number. Maybe a four, I think that would be the lowest I could reasonably go.  

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